January 18, 2009


I don't really feel like it's real.

A lot of it has to do with having an ultrasound and seeing nothing. I just keep thinking that maybe it's not really real. You know?

The good news is that I don't have to wait until the 30th for an ultrasound to tell me if it's real or not. I received an appointment reminder in the mail on Friday saying that I had an ultrasound scheduled for the 23rd. They were supposed to call if the doctor wanted to see me sooner, but maybe they forgot.

I called the nurse and she said the strange thing was that it had just been put into the computer on Friday. So how on earth did the appointment reminder get into my mailbox on Friday?

In any case, I'm going for another one this upcoming Friday. I'm so nervous that they won't see anything. That they'll tell me that nothing is growing and that I'll have to just wait for "nature to take its course." My face has broken out like crazy this week and I'm worried it means that my hormones are shifting . . . in a bad way. I never had this issue with Jack. But I have to keep reminding myself that I had been pumped full of synthetic hormones for over a year before I had Jack so things will be different this time around.

I've lost three pounds (saying that made me feel like Monica on Friends . . . does anyone else remember that episode?) but my pants feel tighter. I know that you show faster the second time around, but seriously?

No comments: