What is it about stickers . ..

. . . that makes them so fascinating to kids?

Battle Wounds

Jack bumped his head really well on Friday. Brian was babysitting but was with Ben and didn't see it happen. And Jack's account is obviously fictional, because it involves leaping from one side of the room to the other in a single bound, as well as a somersault or two.

What we do know is that he somehow slipped and hit his head on the leg of the kitchen table. Hard.

Brian is a wise man and sent a text with a photo to Kyle instead of me, who went home right away without even telling me he was leaving. Before I even knew what was going on, he was pulling back into work. Only after verifying that Jack was okay and didn't need to go to the ER did he tell me what had happened. I took this photo at breakfast this morning, but the bump might have been the biggest I've ever seen on Friday.

Then, while we were playing around in the living room yesterday, Jack tripped and fell into the arm of one of our chairs and was screaming. I literally watched his cheek turn purple right after it happened. It's hard to tell in the picture, but it looks painful.

Their injuries make me want to cry every time. I need to toughen up, because I have a feeling this won't be the last.

Valentine's Day . . . a month and a half later

You guys . . . I'm up to FEBRUARY! That means I'm only a month behind on processing my personal photos. Pat me on the back next time you see me.

I asked Crystal to make me these awesome capes for us to give the boys on Valentine's Day. They loved them and often wear them for their daily "races" around the house.

And here are the valentines that we put together for Jack to give to his class. I had seen this idea before done with gumballs, but was really inspired to do it when I saw that Crystal used rubber bouncy balls. They were so easy. So, so easy. The cost was minimal, too . . . about the same price as boxed valentines and candy would have.

I took Jenny's advice and printed them on sticky paper and folded them over the top of the bag so that we wouldn't have to use staples. The back said "From: Jack" but I don't think I took a picture of that side. I'll probably give these away as a printable freebie next Valentine's Day on the LOD blog.

Bath Lover

Bennett loves bath time. He always has. Jack enjoyed playing in the water, but never got as excited about taking a bath as Ben does. Jack takes mostly showers now, but I don't think Ben will outgrow taking a bath nearly as soon as Jack did.

Building a snowman

I'm just finished processing my January photos, and I wanted to share these for the soap snowman that Jack made for an at-home school project.

It was easy, quick and he really enjoyed it. And because we can build it while sitting in our nice, toasty home, this is the kind of snowman I like to build.

My Not-To-Do List

I just finished a book by Shauna Niequest this winter called Bittersweet: Thoughts on Change, Grace, and Learning the Hard Way. There is so much in this book that I could relate to and share, but the parts that my mind always wanders back to are these:

"This winter, I got the kind of tired that you can't recover form, almost like something gets altered on a cellular level, and you begin to fantasize about what it would be like to just not be tired anymore. You don't fantasize about money or men or the Italian Riviera. All you daydream about is not feeling exhausted, about neck muscles that don't throb, about a mind that isn't fogged every single day."

I know exactly what that is. I felt as though she were reading my thoughts. And as I read the next few pages, I couldn't help but feel as if she were speaking directly to me.

"It's fundamental to my understanding of myself for me to be the strong one, the capable one, the busy one, the one who can bail you out, not make a fuss, bring a meal, add a few more things to the list."

Gulp.

"DO EVERYTHING BETTER [is] a super-charged triple threat, capturing in three words the mania of modern life, the anti-spirit, anti-spiritual, soul-shriveling garbage that infects and compromises our lives."

Double gulp.

"She said it's not hard to decide what you want your life to be about. What's hard, she said, is figuring out what you're willing to give up in order to do the things you really care about . . . . Deciding what I wanted wasn't that hard. But deciding what I'm willing to give up for those things is like yoga for your superego, stretching and pushing and ultimately healing that nasty little person inside of you who exists only for what people think."

I think instead of making to-do lists, it might be time for me to start making "things-not-to-do lists." I just don't even know where to begin.

Refreshed

I went to the Hearts at Home national conference with friends over the weekend and loved it so much. I'm so glad I had the opportunity to go and I plan on going back. I'll write more about the weekend later, but I was really glad to get home to my boys. Both boys ran fevers over the weekend while I was gone (of course they did) and I called Kyle at one point on my way home, only to hear screaming and chaos in the background because JACK HAD JUST SWALLOWED A DIME. But why was he crying? Because he was worried that he wouldn't get it back.

I feel like the weekend provided the right about of a break and encouragement to re-charge me as a mom. I was able to spend a lot of time with them today and it was so much fun to parent with a refreshed perspective on motherhood.

Kyle took Jack to a basketball game tonight and it was just Bennett and I until his bedtime. We had a really good time. I think he liked not having to compete with Jack for attention or getting talked over all the time.

During his snack, I shot this little video. The video right after it was of him accidentally biting his finger . . . it left marks. It is the saddest thing ever, so I decided NOT to share that one.

Take a look at Ben in all of his cuteness.

I have so many videos that I'd like to share! I just need to get them dumped on to my computer first. They literally go back months and months.

Dear Bennett, Months 16 & 17

Dear Ben,

I'm wondering if maybe you'd like to come write this letter, because with the way your verbal skills are multiplying, and the dexterity with which you can operate handheld electronics, it feels as if you're just a few weeks away from being capable of doing so. You speak in garbled words that sound like complete sentences, but usually only contain one or two words that we understand. If we don't get what you're saying, you violently shake your head and say it again. When we finally do interpret your babbles correctly, it's a celebration, complete with flapping arms, bouncing and gleeful exclamations.

You know how to say, "Mama." On occasion, you call me "Mama." But when I instruct you to say, "Say Mama" you always look right at me and clearly say, "Dad-dee!" I can't help but wonder if you know exactly what you're doing and you do it just to drive me crazy.

One of your favorite things to do right is race your brother. You run like a 2-year-old and my guess is that one day you'll be able to hold your own in a race with him pretty well. I'll give the traditional "On your mark, get set, go!" and you two take off running in circles around our house as if it were built to be a track. Sometimes . . . SOMETIMES . . . I'll even race with you guys. As we run, you'll often pump your fists in the air and say, "Go, go, go" which might be the cutest thing I've ever seen. You don't really get that it's a competition, because every time Jack exclaims, "I WIN!" you pump your fists in the air, bounce up and down and say, "Yay!"

In January, you were really sick with bronchitis and fever. I hated seeing you like that . . . struggling to breathe and lethargic. You curled up in my lap, sucking your thumb and just sat there while I held you. I'm not glad you were sick, but I really did enjoy snuggling with you. I know these times will get fewer as you get older.

Your dancing and singing might be my favorite thing about the last few months. I love it when a song you recognize comes on and you start waiving your hands and shaking your bottom. Then you'll just start spinning in circles until you're too dizzy to stand. It makes me a little dizzy just watching you.

You're becoming such a funny little boy. You exclaim "tadaaa" whenever you find something new. You sing along with songs, using words that only you can understand. You blow kisses with smacking noises that can be heard from several rooms away. You pretend to comb our hair and brush our teeth. You brings us plastic cups, instructing us to "dink" and won't be happy until we make fake slurping noises and say thank you.

I love you, Bennett!

Mama

Christmas Pajamas

Here are the boys in their Christmas pajamas. As you may or may not remember, Christmas day at our house this year didn't allow for much picture-taking.

Better late than never, right?

Taking off my cranky pants

I'm headed to a $2000 dentist appointment in a little bit. At my check up last month, there was nothing wrong. Today? "SURPRISE! We need you to pay us $2000."

Our grand total of unexpected expenses for 2011 is at almost half of my annual salary. By the way, it's only February. Also, we're still down one car.

I want to complain. I so badly want to whine about how awful this is, but as much as I try not to, my mind keeps taking me back to how fortunate I am. Well, fortunate and in debt. But fortunate, nonetheless.

I don't want to feel that way. I want to stomp and throw a tantrum, much like Jack does when things don't go his way. I don't want to count my blessings . . . I want to stress out. And in all honesty, I've done a little bit of that today. But there's something that keeps cutting into my self-pity and stressing.

I've been more intentional about reading my Bible this month (I'm trying to do the New thru 30 reading plan . . . though it'll likely end up being New thru 90 at the rate I'm going).
In Hebrews, the author says, "For the word of God is living and active and sharper than any two-edged sword, and piercing as far as the division of soul and spirit, of both joints and marrow, and able to judge the thoughts and intentions of the heart."

That's not just good writing. It's truth and I've seen the evidence over the last few weeks. When I'm reading the Bible regularly, it sticks with me. The words are life giving and bring perspective. I absorb them and they become a part of who I am. Whether I obey them or not . . . well, that's still my decision . . . but their transforming work begins even without my permission.

I just keep remembering that I'm a part of something way larger than myself. My mind goes back to the fact that there's a bigger story at play, and while I need to be responsible with my finances, how much money I have is ultimately not the point. Comfort is not the point. Retiring to someplace warm some day would be nice . . . but it's also not the point.

Let's face it . . . in the grand scheme of things, we're already pretty darn comfortable. We have a home that we love. A car that is way more than enough to get us where we need to go. We have access to medical and dental care. This massive infection in my mouth? It'll be gone in a few hours. Kyle's kidney stones? Almost gone, with both kidneys still functioning. Both of my boys are healthy and breathing clearly. Our refrigerator is full and our heat is on. We have so much more than we need. Even if none of the above were true, I could still tell of abundant blessings.

I kind feel like laying in bed crying and feeling sorry for myself, but my mind and my heart won't let me do it . . . because I can't even remember why I was complaining in the first place.

More of this . . .

Technically speaking, this picture isn't all that remarkable.

Emotionally speaking, it's the best picture I've taken all month.

We've been seeing a lot more of this at our house. Laughing together. Playing together. Brotherly love. Granted, with it comes more fighting, hitting and shoving, but we're working through it.

I'm certain this brotherly love will also lead to more mischief and scheming. Earlier this week, I found the two of them at the top of the basement stairs with a couch cushion perched precariously at the top. When I asked what they were doing, Jack replied, "Sledding."

Oh, sure . . . sledding down the stairs on a couch cushion? No problem. Later I'll give you a pair of scissors to run with and a book of matches to play with.

They play games that I don't understand. They laugh at jokes that I don't get. They race in circles around the house and Bennett doesn't care yet that Jack is always the winner. They're bonding, and that makes me happy.

Jack's imagination, much like any three-year old's imagination, is CRAZY right now. He makes up these scenarios and stories and acts them out. He regularly asks if I can come watch the football or baseball games he's playing with all of his friends in the living room.

He's also become quite the negotiator. I know that whenever he says, "Mom, I really like your hair today" or "That's a great shirt" or "I love you so much, Mom" that he's getting ready to ask for something . . . usually to watch a show.

Bennett tries to repeat everything that we say, sometimes successfully. I heard him use his first two-word phrase this wee:"ree book?" In case you don't speak baby, the translation is: "Read a book?"

Ben's also trying to take the stairs like a big boy, which scares me. He's so much faster and it's so much safer when he crawls down, but I don't want to prevent him from trying something that he's ready to do. So every trip up and down stairs is a little bit longer.

It's trite, but true . . . they're growing up so fast.

The big 1-0-0-0

It's only 47 degrees outside, but it feels like 75 degrees to my soul.

This week of warmer weather was exactly what I needed. I realize that snow is predicted for next week and the high a week from today will only be 24, but that's okay because tomorrow we're going to make dinner on the grill. I feel like after this week, I can make it to spring.

Yesterday I realized that I missed acknowledging my 1000th blog post a few weeks ago. So . . . I guess that's what I'm doing now. I've posted more than 1000 times in my 4 years of blogging. You're welcome.

I also just noticed that I never posted a fourth annual "best of" like I normally do during the first week of January. So, here you go . . . the best of 2010:

January

February

March

April

May

June

July

August

September

October

November

December


If you're looking for more reading material, you could check out the best of 2007, the best of 2008 and the best of 2009. You can thank me later.

Sledding

A few more sledding pictures from the first week of January . . .

Dear Jack, Months 43 & 44

Dear Jack,

This letter is late, so I'm combining January and February into one. It's not that I haven't had anything to write. This has weighed so heavy on my heart that it's just now that I'm able to find the words.

Let me back up and tell you about your obsession with strangers. About a year ago, you started to become fascinated with people you don't know. Not really with the actual people as much as the fact that there are millions of individuals that don't know you, have no relationship with you and live their own lives completely separate from you. The first time we told you that you weren't supposed to talk to strangers or follow a stranger, unless you were with someone you knew, it opened up a whole new world of questions.

"Are they strangers?"

"What do strangers do?"

"Do strangers like onions?"

"Do strangers have moms and dads?"

You haven't asked much about strangers in the last few months, but every so often you'll ask someone in the check-out line or you'll stick your head under the bathroom stall partition while I'm changing your brother's diaper to ask if they're a stranger or not (so not kidding about this one . . . that lady is now much less of a stranger than she wants to be).

We've done a great job in teaching you that unless you're with an adult that you know, you aren't to speak to people you don't know. If there were a handbook for parenting, surely that would be on the "List of Important Things to Teach Your Children." Well, that and teaching your child not to poke his head under bathroom stall partitions.

Recently, I've felt the need to amend that rule. A few weeks ago, an acquaintance of ours died in a household accident. I won't go into details, but it was sudden, and the details surrounding the accident and his life made it even more heartbreaking.

To say were were "acquaintances" is probably generous. Your dad had spoken to him several times while doing yard work. After one of the first few times dad had contact with him, I felt convicted about getting to know him better. He told dad about some of the things his family had been through, and I was shocked that we had lived near him or six years and knew none of it.

We felt God compelling us to get to know him better. But we had lots of excuses. "It'll be easier in the spring . . . we're too busy in the summer . . . he probably doesn't have any interest in knowing us, anyway."

And then one morning, he was gone.

I don't know if we would have made any difference in his life, or if he would have even accepted a chance to know us better. I don't know if we would have had the opportunity to show him how much we need Jesus, or if we would have even been able to just share a meal with him. What I do know is that God spoke, and we ignored it. We were disobedient.

It's uncomfortable to share this with you, but I have to. I've spent time teaching you not to talk to strangers, but I also want to teach you to TALK TO STRANGERS. People don't learn to know and love Jesus by us just telling them. They learn by watching us know him and love him. They don't need us to talk to them about how much Jesus will change their lives. They need to see how much He's changed ours. We can quote scripture and hand out pamphlets and pray for people all we want, but God uses our relationships with others most powerfully in drawing people to Him. And when we ignore him . . . when we're disobedient . . . it's sin. Plain and simple.

Too few Christians know how to have a non-awkward conversation about Jesus' work in their lives. One of my parenting goals is for you and Bennett to know how to share what Jesus has done for you in a natural way. Your preschool teacher told me that you were sharing about what you had learned in Sunday School with your class one day, and it made me feel like we're heading in the right direction.

And honestly, this is about more than just evangelism. It's about obedience to God. It's about feeling his nudge and following through, rather than making excuses.

So should you or shouldn't you talk to strangers? Until you're old enough, you'll just have to ask me first.

But always, always wait until after they're out of the bathroom stall.

Love,
Mom

Avoiding the "Tilt & Nod"

I just spent 30 minutes composing a post about how I've been feeling the last two weeks, but deleted it. I just can't find the right words, and it would have depressed anyone who read it. And, I definitely would have gotten the "sympathetic head tilt and nod" the next I saw you. I hate the tilt and nod.

In short, I feel like winter is sitting on my chest and bouncing up and down in an effort to knock the wind out of me. Spring cannot come too quickly.

Instead of depressing you further, I'll share this little gem from after we took Jack sledding shortly after Christmas. It's the ultimate in hat hair.